If you’re one of my faithful readers, then you’re aware of how much I stress the importance of Frame when dealing with girls. Being the leader, taking charge and showing initiative are keys to your success with women, but are there times when you should let the woman lead?
Here’s Two Tips For Getting A Girlfriend:
2. Making The Relationship Exclusive
I turned on a film the other day, I can’t even recall the name because it sickened me so I turned it off, but the male lead was essentially begging his girlfriend to move in with him and take “their relationship to the next level”. The girl laughed at first, then in a halting manner agreed. At this point, the dumbass guy continued to prattle about their future and she was turned off by his behavior. Within a few minutes they went from making plans to move in together, to them breaking up and her heading to a party where she got fucked in the bathroom by a random dude.
Now let’s examine what the fuck he did wrong, because he was the leader by taking the initiative, correct? Incorrect. Leading is not begging, pleading or putting your cards out on the table first, it’s the opposite.
If you want a relationship with a girl (and a lot of you do, whether now, or in the future), you must let her make the first move to exclusivity. Trust me on this: If she is the one to initiate “The Talk”, and she is the one to ask for exclusivity, and she is the one who wants you two to be BF/GF, the relationship ‘power’ will be in your hands.
Fact 1: In today’s day and age, girls are bombarded by thirsty beta bitch boys.
Fact 2: The moment you become easily attainable, is the moment where the mystery dissipates and can altogether disappear quickly.
So let’s get practical: You meet a girl out at the club, you start hanging out and you decide in your mind, that you would like to be in a relationship with her. How do you do that if you’re not the one to ask? Listen up gents, I’m about to tell you.
By hanging out with her a couple of times a week and not just for sex. You actually do activities. Guaranteed after a couple of months, she’ll ask “where’s this going?”. You stay casual and continue hanging out with her allowing your ACTIONS to dictate where it’s going, not your words.
After another month or two (if she’s into you and is of quality LTR material), she will hint or directly ask if you’re down with being exclusive. NOTE: If she’s just a FWB, then don’t expect this. You have to actually do activities outside of having sex, for her relationship hamster to start spinning.
THIS IS KEY:
You do NOT agree right away. Make her work for this privilege. Say you want to think about it. Continue hanging out with her and then decide on your own terms if you’d like to be exclusive. If so then you approach from a position of her initiating the idea and from the power of being wanted, as well as the power of the pursued, not as the pursuer. This is fundamentally key to the relationship starting off on the right foot.
#1. The Four Letter “L” Word
Do not be the guy professing your ‘love’ for her first. She will say it when she ‘feels’ it. This does not mean you have to reply immediately with your profession of love, instead you can use this. Regardless, the girl should ALWAYS be the first one to say it. The same principles apply as in the previous point.
When she is the pursuer, you keep her engaged, attracted and let’s be honest, the pressure is off you! Now you can live your life and let her do the work of ‘tying’ you down.
This has been an excerpt from The Alpha Playboy Part 2 coming soon. To get Part 1 click here.