(Christian here. This post is a guest submission from the winner of the From Beta To Alpha 6 Month Coaching Program, Chef Jackson.)
4 months into being coached by Christian McQueen, I found myself in a situation that seemed out of a romantic comedy: the girl I had been crushing on since we first met on a trip abroad almost 4 years ago was nearly begging to go out with me.
On a Thursday evening the tall, big-boobed blonde texted me:
“Hola! What you up to tomorrow or Sunday evening?”
I smirked, thinking, “Huh, someone wants to see me this weekend.”
I let her know I was seeing friends at a bar and she could join.
I didn’t really care…which even surprised me.
Ever since we hung out about once a month, I would casually talk about cool shit going on in my life. She kept hinting that I had changed…but she couldn’t put a finger on it…whether it was my vibe or something else.
Yea, I guess I had.
It happens when you hang out with people who know there stuff when it comes to anything from making a million bucks to gaming chicks. That’s been one of my favorite parts about hanging out with McQueen, just absorbing tips, tricks and his mindset.
Since I met Christian, here are some first-hand experiences I’ve had:
- During one of many nights out with Christian, he talked two girls into joining us in his Uber ride to head to an after-party venue. I hit it off with one and we dated for a few months. She was my first regular.
- Seeing a line with tons of hotties snake around the corner at a nightclub, Christian shook hands with the doorman, gave him a tip and we walked right in, up to the VIP corner.
- He’s fun to go out with, and I enjoy hearing him talk about how he deals with women.
Even my blonde “friend” noticed something different about me.
Namely that I just DON’T CARE ANYMORE.
I don’t care if she’s into me or not.
Because I have another girl, a gorgeous Ethiopian who likes it when I show my dominant side, I even may have mentioned this to the blonde at some point.
As I took an Uber to the bar that Friday night to meet my friends. Blondie gives me a call:
Blondie: “Hey, who else is coming to the bar?”
Me: “It doesn’t matter.”
Blondie: “Who is coming?”
Me: “George Clooney”
Blondie: (laughing)“I’ve actually met him and blah blah blah”
(I think to myself that I’m the prize.)
Me: “It doesn’t matter. You’re coming to see me. Isn’t that right?” I say, cutting her off.
Blondie: “Well, yeah.”
Me: “So come.”
Blondie: “I don’t know, I’m kind of buzzed.”
Me: “Then get a cab or Uber.”
Me: “Look, I’m going, are you coming now, yes or no? It’s a simple decision.”
Me: “Ok, I’ll see you there.” (Click, I end the call)
At the bar I’m hanging out with my friends and am enjoying myself.
She shows up, looking cute and stylish. She compliments me on my look…saying I look healthy and well.
I had just gotten back from a 4 day weekend trip to an alternative festival, where I got a nice tan and experienced ridiculous live shows, bands, hippie workshops, girls and more. I have cool stories from the trip and have the next one already booked.
I give her some attention and then turn back to my friends.
My priority is always my friends, especially one who I haven’t seen in months, and this girl is nothing more than a side dish to my evening.
She makes small talk with people in the group, some guys hit on her, but she’s always looking back at me.
My friends leave and I stay to hang with her a bit. She moves close to my body, her lips inches away from my face. Do I kiss her?
My mind thinks…of course I do. But I’d like to do so in a dominating fashion.
I think of Don Draper and grab the back of her head and pull her in for a kiss. She loves it.
Later we bounce to another bar, and I pull another McQueen move: I tell her I’ll drive her home, as I take her keys and escort her to the passenger seat.
At her place we kiss more, but I don’t push too hard and leave her when I feel like it.
In the car ride back, I smirk. ‘How the hell did this happen?’ Here I was thrown out of the friendzone. Funny how girls can detect when you’re popular with other girls.
The hardest and most contradictory element I’ve picked up from McQueen is to: Push for what you want, but be completely outcome independent.
Essentially, be strong and go for it, but do not care if it happens or not.
There are plenty of fish in the sea. Always have, always will be.
Your frame defines how you are with women. The way you talk, text, flirt, touch and even ask a girl on a date all contribute to your success with women. If you follow Christian’s blog, you know he’s all about keeping it simple and that less is more.
Also, don’t lose your dignity as a man, as no woman is worth it.
Acting desperate is a fool’s game and this societal obsession with “persistence will win!” is absolutely ridiculous. Life’s not a rom-com where if you really go for the girl, it will work out.
It’s actually about hardwork and learning from your mistakes. Here are a few of mine:
- Wasting time (and money) on a 30-something divorcee with kids.
- Buying shots for girls at clubs and seeing nothing come of it.
- Texting girls I barely know with emoticons and/or exclamation points and question marks.
In any type of coaching, you get out what you put in.
Am I full on alpha playboy with models on my arm?
Am I having more success with women than I was before meeting McQueen?
Just ask my old “friend” the blonde.
She actually just called me as I was writing this.
But this post (and the rest of my life takes priority).
What will happen with her? I don’t know…and don’t really care. I don’t expect anything, but I’ll make moves to go for what I want.
It’s heating up in Sin City. Can you handle the heat?
Honestly, did you spend your youth dreaming of working a 9-5 and having sex with average girls? Go here.
Read More: 4 Game Tips I’ve Learned From McQueen