How To Be Cool: Part 1

Note: This is a monster post of over 3,000 words, but it’s well worth the read. If you have a hard time getting through long articles, take your time with this one, because I’m spittin’ straight gold. This is just Part 1 too, which has 10 Traits of Cool Cats, but I have another monster post planned for Part 2. If you’ve never bookmarked one of my articles, now is the time to do so.

It’s ironic how in the self-improvement arena for men, there are countless articles on how to be healthier, what cologne to wear, how to meet girls and how to better one’s finances, but hardly a mention on what it really means to be cool.

I’m guilty of it too.

I’ve written on all of the aforementioned subjects, but have neglected one of the most important: how does a cat become cool?

Is it a magic potent?

Does one only need to wear a certain type of sunglasses?

Is suiting up what separates a cool cat from a schmuck?

While these are all window dressings that help a man look cool, they are not inherently what makes him cool.

Being cool is much deeper than that.

It’s an essence, an energy, a charisma and knack for knowing what to say at the right time, combined with a myriad of other variables, but I’ve broken down a few for you.

I can teach you how to be cool, but you still have to earn it.

You ready?

Here’s 10 Tips On How To Be Cool that will set you on your journey.


#10. Your Style Is Classic

You know why a good pair of jeans, a fitted white t-shirt and a solid pair of boots looked good in the 60’s and still looks good today?


Because it’s a damn classic look.

You know why a tailored suit and a pocket square looked good in the 60’s and still looks good today?SHARP-SUITS-PAGE-104-105-Dean-Martin-and-Frank-Sinatra-1961daniel-craig-defiance-dvd-05

Because it’s a damn classic look.

If you’re one of those cats who struggles with style, I’ll let you in on a little trick: stick with classic outfits and you’ll always look like a million bucks. Stay away fom trends, fads and what’s ‘hot’. By the time you jump on that bandwagon it’ll be something else, so stick to classics and you’ll always look like a man who’s effortless dressed.

#9. You Can Dominate A Social Setting

I broke down exactly how to do this in this 3 part series, How To Dominate A Social Setting Part 1, Part 2 and Part 3 so you have the tools to learn how to do it. The rest is up to you to put in the time and effort to use these tools to develop the ‘talent’ of working a room.

Show me a man who can work a room and I’ll show you a man with some element of coolness. Guaranteed.

#8. You Are A Casanova With Women

Name any real cool cat, whether dead or living, and you can bet the farm on the fact that they are good with women. God knows I’ve written my fingers off on how to meet and bed women, so once again you have the tools at your disposal to develop these cool ‘talents’.

Part of being cool is that other men should desire to be you and women should desire to want to sleep with you. Fact.

The rest is up to you.

#7. You Have Formed Your Own Rat Pack

Is a man a success if he has no friends to enjoy it with? What is a million bucks in your closet, if you don’t have a single soul you can call to help you spend it? While friends can come and go, it’s important to build your inner circle so that you can enjoy your playboy journey together and make some great memories.

If you’re struggling to find like minded men to have a cigar and a drink with, then don’t trip, I have a great up coming article on how to meet other like minded men so you can build your own rat pack.

Until then, check out one of my older articles: The Importance Of Building Your Own Rat Pack.

#6. You Have An Air Of Mystery

In today’s day and age where everyone feels the need to air every single aspect of their life on social media, there’s nothing wrong with swimming upstream and keeping your private life, well uh, private.

One day this generation is going to look back at their ‘Tell-All’ mentality with shame.

You want to be a Man of Mystery? Get off Facebook, Instagram and any other retarded app that serves only to get you so caught up in the mundane, that you cannot get fed up with being average.

Like I’ve said before: I’ve yet to meet a millionaire that uses any social media, except for business. If it’s not making you money, sign off. Get specific reasons here in Should Men Use Social Media?

#5. You Learn To Fix Some Shit

I’m serious. I’ve never seen a generation be entirely useless except for knowing how to do some shit on a computer.

Here’s the deal: Hollywood laments constantly on how they cannot find young male actors like Steve McQueen, Marlon Brando and James Dean. Instead they shove Robert Pattinson and Zac Efron down our throats and wonder why these ladyboys fail to connect with male audiences. It’s because while they may have the appearance of stars of ore, their actual essence is not backed up by anything concrete. They have not truly lived life like the old stars and that’s partly what is missing. 

The reason why McQueen was so believable in Bullitt racing through the streets of San Francisco, is because he actually raced cars in his real life.


The reason why Brando gave off such a bad boy vibe so well in The Wild One, is because he really rode and fixed motorcycles in his real life and was a notorious womanizer.

There are certain things you cannot fake.

Be a man of substance and develop your skills in something that not everyone can do.

It doesn’t have to be mechanics, but God help you if you can’t fix your own flat and you have to call AAA every time something happens to your car.

I’ll never forget I was driving from Vegas to Los Angeles some years ago in an old 94′ sedan. This thing was an absolute beast of a machine, V8 and over 130k on the odometer. The car was usually a solid car, but the Vegas heat had done a number on the coolant system so I was praying it would make it to LA.

To make matters worse I had a sexy Latina filly in the car who I had only hung out with a couple of times. Yes, I had already banged her, but as we men do, I wanted to impress her a bit more before I let my guard down.

Lo and behold you already know what happened.

118 degrees.

Around 2pm on Highway 15 with not a gas station in sight and only truckers whizzing by not giving two fucks…

…and the car overheats.


Almost as dramatic as U-Turn the film with Sean Penn and I did have a Latina with me kind of like this chica…


Once the needle hit the red I knew the engine could blow, so I immediately pulled off in the gravel. The chick gives me a look like “We’re going to die right?” and I hop out of the car cursing silently like a drunk sailor.

Unbeknownst to her, I had planned in advance and had stored 2 gallon jugs of water in the trunk.

I’m standing there in the 118 degree heat, sun beating down, sweat on my brow, white t-shirt sticking to me, with a lit cigarette dangling from my mouth and I ‘fixed’ the car. Now I won’t even bullshit, and you mechanics out there will know what I’m talking about, but I poured water into the radiator which in turn cooled the engine down and after waiting a few minutes started her back up. Note: this was lukewarm water. Do NOT pour cold water into a still-hot radiator, because it could cause the engine block to crack. Don’t say I didn’t warn you ha.

The look the sexy filly gave me when I stepped back into the car was priceless. Let me tell you: that look was earned.

Too many young cats nowadays are so concerned with their hairstyles and clothes, that they forget what the essence of being a man is. Be the man who gets shit done, fixes shit when it needs to be fixed, doesn’t have go pick up the cats at Home Depot from across the border every time there’s an issue and you’ll be on your way to truly being cool.

#4. You Get Your Hands Dirty

This piggybacks on #5, but I will push this a bit further with another personal story.

Having grown up in a construction family I knew the basics of carpentry, but never was forced to work in order to eat. When I hit college, I decided I liked to eat, so I started working for a major commercial construction company as a laborer.

Pouring concrete.

And basically being the yard bitch.

The first day of work I show up with my work boots already roughed up. I hadn’t touched a hammer in years, but I knew the first rule of working construction is to never show up to work with brand new boots.

One of my buddies wasn’t as tuned in and showed up with brand new boots. This obviously marked him as a rookie.

He lasted ONE day and had to quit for being a pussy due to their teasing.

They actually called him ‘Mayo’ cuz his skin was so fair and he never got any sun.

Another one of my buddies, a former high school quarterback lasted TWO days.

I was the smallest and least strongest of my other two friends and I lasted the entire job, well, until I showed up drunk one too many times and got fired, but that was after 4 months of working there, had saved the money I needed and I decided to fuck around.

I lost 12lbs that first month of work, but I gained two things that cannot be faked:

-Mental strength

-Physical strength

Construction strength will give you a different type of muscle density that not even lifting weights can do. You think you’re strong? Go carry a couple pieces of sheet rock up a 20 foot scaffolding and then we’ll talk.

Working construction can be BRUTAL mentally if you can’t handle getting teased and if you don’t learn to dish it back.


Yes, I did this exact shit.

The first couple of days of work, everyone was focused on weeding out my friends so I was left alone, but once they quit, I was the new target.

One of the days I wore leather work gloves, because I had ripped my hand in a bar fight over the weekend. That’s the other rule of construction: you really shouldn’t show up with gloves (and brand new boots) and no sooner did I slip them on, then the foreman started in on me. I knew I was asking for it, but my hand really was fucked up.

This guy was around 5’9″, but built like a bull. I’ll put it this way: he didn’t have a neck.

“Christian! Go get me some plumb bob oil. Now, you stupid fuck!” I laughed in his face, because I had been around construction sites enough to know that it doesn’t exist and that’s a rookie joke.

He was surprised I knew it, but came right back at me. “Why you wearing gloves? You afraid you might get splinters in your velvet hands? Your boyfriend like your hands soft when you’re jerking him off?”

“No Frank”, I replied, “Your wife doesn’t like my fingers to be rough when I’m fingering her pussy when you work late”.

Dead silence.

I knew I took a risk going for the jugular immediately, but these type of guys are relentless and you have to stand up for yourself.

“Well played. Well played”. Frank struggled to keep a smile from appearing and from that day on we were good. He didn’t mess with me not one more time and I had the respect of everyone on the site.

I’d like to see the Geek Squad at Best Buy handle that kind of ‘abuse’.

It’s not abuse, it’s called what every man from the World War II era went through and that’s why they were some real tough sonofbitches. I bet your grandfathers are some tough cats.

Cut from a different breed.

Do yourself a favor and get your hands dirty. Go work construction for a summer, or if you’re broke pack your car and head to the oil fields for a job. If Clint Eastwood wasn’t too good to dig ditches before he became famous, then I’m sure you can handle it too and he’s the definition of tough.

You will build a mental and physical strength that others cannot help but notice. You’ll make good money if you’re Union, won’t even need to hit the gym and will be so dead tired when you get home, you won’t give two fucks about feminism or bitching about anything online. You will be on your way to becoming cool and it won’t be flash: you’ll have earned it.

#3. You Develop Your Own Swagger

Your. Own. Swagger.

What marks legends as being ‘cool’?

Prince is cool.

James Dean was cool.

Clint Eastwood is cool.

Johnny Depp is cool.

Sean Connery is cool

While each and everyone of these cats are cool in their OWN right, they’re all uniquely different. Johnny Depp cool is different than Sean Connery cool. They’re both cool, but they have their own unique brand of coolness.

Countless dead and living legends among men were and are cool, because they were and are unique.

This is really fucking key so pay attention:

While you can adopt physical style and mannerisms of cool cats, you have to find your own unique swagger and let that become your own brand of cool.

Copying James Dean will only work so much.

Acting like Steve McQueen will only get you so far.

Talking like Clint Eastwood may make you look like a retard.

You have to develop your inner confidence and let it exude through your own natural swagger into being your own brand of cool.

You can’t be me like I can be me.

I can’t be you as well as you can be you.

Each and every one of you reading this right now has it within you to be your own unique brand of cool.

After you get your suits tailored, your hair cut stylishly and your pocket square ruffled just so, it’s just the beginning. Every single article on this blog (150+ articles and counting) has been leading you, the reader, up to this point: All of these trimmings mean jackshit, if you do not allow your unique inner self to shine.

Referring back to myself with another personal anecdote I’ll make this more clear.

The first real cool cat I ever met and who introduced me to the concept of getting clubs On-Lock was a smooth motherfucker.

When I first met him, I started to emulate him.

He talked low, slow and moved with purpose (or didn’t move at all).

I learned a shit ton from him.

I tried my best to become him, but something didn’t quite feel right.

Then it hit me: I wasn’t being true to myself.

I’m more of an outgoing, work the room, smile and be the life of the party, while my buddy and mentor was more of the mysterious stranger at the corner of the bar who girls would approach. I had to approach.

What worked for him, while it got me jumpstarted, wasn’t going to be my everything. It couldn’t be, because I am a unique individual with my own personal talents and strengths.

I took what I learned from this cool cat, and meshed certain attributes of his into my own personality and then let my new and improved self shine. And I killed it.

Not only did we work better as wingmen together, but now I wasn’t wrapped up in his identity and instead created my own reputation and eventually legacy in that certain city.

You can learn a lot from me, but you cannot be me.

You can learn how to dress, how to be stylish, how to live the playboy lifestyle and how to get laid from me, but at the end of the day: you have to take your strengths and be your own person.

When you do this, you will allow your inner swagger to be unleashed and will be on your way to being truly cool.

 #2. You Never Show Your Hand

Keep your cards close.

Keep your enemies closer than your friends.

Never react to someone else’s move until you’ve planned yours and their next two.

Don’t react off the cuff and think before you speak.

There is a time and a place and part of being cool is to know the difference.


I’ve gotten in fights, both physical and verbal and sometimes I regretted jumping off the handle, but I’ve never regretted staying cool and making a plan.

Any guy can pop off and react with emotion, but it takes a real man to keep his cool and handle the situation with his brains, instead of his brawn. Not saying there’s not a time to crack someone in the jaw, but usually fights happen over petty shit.

Don’t be petty.

Don’t be dramatic.

#1. You Are A Rebel WITH A Cause

Much has been made of James Dean’s film Rebel WithOUT A Cause, and it does perfectly capture teenage rebellion and the era it depicts. However, I challenge you to not be a hormonal driven teenager, but instead a ‘rebel’ WITH a cause.

If you find yourself being an office drone and sucking on the tit of the corporate world, when instead you would like to sell your Ikea furniture, wax your surfboard and make your living being a surf photographer, then be a rebel WITH a cause.

Make your plan, then execute it.

You really only do live once and I can tell you that life is too damn short to spend it miserable building someone else’s dream.

One trait of every cool cat that has left a legacy, is that they did it their way.

Don’t be a conformist afraid to buck against what ‘everyone else’ is doing.

Everyone else right now in America is overweight, depressed and boring.

Is that what you want for your life?

Figure out what your real dreams are, make actionable goals to achieve those dreams, and start on your new journey.

Part of being cool is doing what you want to do when you want to and having real freedom. What are you doing today to create a real life of freedom for tomorrow?

This has been a MONSTER post, but if you enjoyed it, leave a comment below. Part 2 of the How To Be Cool Series will be out next week.

Sick and tired of no dates and lack of sex?? Click the banner above to solve those problems right now.

Get started on becoming the ultimate playboy here.

Read More: Must Read: 5 Tips For How To Build The Life You Want

43 Replies to “How To Be Cool: Part 1”

  1. This shits gold! I work in the timber industry. Talk about a dog eat dog world. You either learn to hold your own and when necessary give it right back or you will get eaten alive. Its a great industry that has molded me into a tough man mentally and physically. Your blog resonates with me – b/c you are the real deal. Its obvious you’ve paid your dues..


  2. So fuckin weird , I’ve been surfing since I was 7 years old, now 20 years later today and I’m not kidding is the first day I’ve said to myself “shit I could make money taking pics of people surfing and make cash” so too see that exact example from you on this day in particular is part random coincidence or just sheer destiny it doesn’t really matter , I just kinda tripped out for a second of all the days I coulda read this blog post I picked today and felt the need to leave this comment


  3. Thanks Christian! I really appreciate all your hard work to help us, and this coming form a young man, I am only 17 but it never hurts to start early, actually, I have been getting laid a LOT more since I started following your’s and RoK advice.


    1. Thanks brother, I appreciate that. You’re NEVER too young to start learning this stuff and you’ll be light years ahead of your peers as you start to apply it.


  4. Mcqueen your stuff is top notch. I read a few other blogs like D&P, GLL and Roosh’s, but honestly your blog has set a new standard. Not to sound like I’m on your nuts, but you’re #1 in my book. Keep it up, I appreciate it!


    1. Those are good blogs, but thanks for the support Jay. I only strive to keep pushing my limits and delivering the best content I can produce.


  5. This information is just absolute gold! This is more valuable than any how to pick up chicks or what lines to use on a women book or forum!
    This is the essence of what it is to be a man.
    Thank you so much for this Christian. Your posts have been outstanding.
    Much appreciated!


    1. I’m glad you noted that: “the essence of what it is to be a man”. That’s the point and thank you for the comment.


    1. I use my surroundings.


      If it’s a nightlife venue: I’ll comment on the Dj. He sucks, or he’s really good. I saw him at LIV in Miami last month blah blah blah.

      If daytime, I use surroundings. Do you bring your dog to this park alot? I heard the wolfman has been snatching pups up left and right blah blah blah. I was going to bring my racket and play some tennis, but got distracted by the concept of having to sweat blah blah blah we should play sometime, put your number in.

      Ramble to me is taking your surroundings and building from it. This requires one to think on their feet quickly and is basically improv.

      One suggestion and a future blog post I have planned, is for players to take acting classes. Doesn’t mean you have to be the next Denzel, but it will help you improv on the fly, plus the classes are full of hotties dying for cock.


  6. From bob marley to eric clapton , the white t-shirt and black jeans is a legendary statement. You really know your shit…


  7. McQueen

    A recurring idea I keep seeing is pulling women’s emotional strings.

    Do you have a manifesto on that?

    That seems to be the cornerstone of game that no one has covered too well- pulling her emotional triggers and not letting her get to you and pull yours.

    Methods, ideas, themes- there has got to be a systematic way to run women’s emotions like a boss from the boss (you).


    1. J Bone, much of what you’re talking about has to do with Deep Conversion techniques. I wrote about that in TAP 1 and some in TAP 2. There are excerpt articles if you search ‘Deep Conversion’ in my blog search box to give you an idea.

      In addition I’m working on something I may or may not release, which is Advanced Deep Conversion Techniques. It’s borderline brainwashing, but is quite effective.


  8. I worked the warehouses and factories for 3 years. Not the same breed of men as construction but definitely street tough too. A lot of ex cons, drug dealers, and womanizers roam those places, “men” to put it that way. You think high school/college is a tough hierarchy, shit you haven’t seen nothing yet. Red pill mentality also, seen married men hooking up with married women in the same workplace like it was completely normal. Makes corporate H.R rules seem like a joke, and the women crying harassment seem like prudes.


    1. Yep. Makes it nigh impossible to switch from that environment to a corporate ass kissing PC environment too.


    1. Great post again Mr McQueen. Especially like what you have written ‘about finding your own style’ – I remember somebody did a great ROK article a few months ago about coming of age films for young men, following on from that I’d like to add that there is no better way for a young man to find himself than to get thrown to the sharks in a labour environment. I worked a cool automotive trade from age 16 for a world leading brand, and whilst I always wanted the big bucks I earn now I’ve moved up the career path (and the brand new Jaguar that comes with it), i can honestly say I miss the jokes and ‘banter’ as we call it in the UK. These boffins and computer nerds that have been through private schooling that I’m now surrounded with wouldn’t last a day in a mechanics garage and when times get tough they are the first to fold. It’s a cliche that runs true with game: You can be taught all the stuff from the best scholars in the world, but unless you’ve been in the field to apply and learn the vocation hands on, you’ll never have a solid foundation.

      Looking forward to part 2.


      1. Thanks for the share. Yep, two different worlds, but being able to navigate both will open your network up and keep you fluid socially.


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