“These girls will be down to party with us later, just be chill”, my former mentor in college whispered in my ear at the crowded college bar. “How do you know?” I retorted. “I just do. I’m seven years older than you and I’ve had way more fucking experience, so just follow my lead”, he responded with.
I ordered another shot and sulked.
I thought I was spitting some of the best game of my life. In actuality, I was trying too hard.
More drinks followed the shot, more flirting and then my mentor, myself, and three sexy college girls left the bar. I knew my mentor was getting the hottest girl of the group, first out of respect (that’s how it goes) and secondly, because she was kissing him with the passion of a thousand virgins rolled up into one 110lb cute blonde.
That left me with two options. A cute redhead, but not being a big fan of pale skin and her consistent wailing to her girlfriends about her ex-boyfriend, left me with the final and more likely option: a cute brunette with big breasts and a great smile. She was vivacious and curious about me from the jump, but in typical arrogant fashion at the time, and being new to this thing called ‘game’ I was spitting ‘witty’ shit left and right. As the night progressed, she seemed more distant, but I plunged on until the cautious words from my mentor caused me to take a step back and chill.
We arrived at my mentor’s house, a humble, but clean and well set-up house. The ginger departed to chase down her ex-boyfriend and myself and the brunette were left in the living room while my mentor and his sexyass blonde found refuge to fornicate in his bedroom. I had had some experience with girls and was well over 20 notches, but had one big problem: I overgamed constantly.
“You like that don’t you?”, the brunette said softly after we kissed. “Eh, it was okay, I’ve had better”, I retorted.
“What the fuck is your deal!”, she yelled back. I shushed her and leaned back. I thought I was doing a good job of push-pulling, but in fact, I was being an idiot.
“Nothing”, I mumbled back and tried kissing her. She pushed me away. “You know, I liked you from the get-go of meeting you, but you keep acting weird”.
“I did?” I was lost at this point.
For one thing the ‘game’ I was using seemed to work, but did it really? She had seemed very interested from the beginning and then as the night progressed she seemed more distant. Maybe I over did it…
“I wanted to sleep with you, but it’s just weird now. I’m gonna go to sleep”. She curled up on the couch and almost instantly went to sleep.
I was shocked.
I went into the bathroom and took a long look into the mirror. She wasn’t being a bitch, she wasn’t being a cock-tease. I simply had overgamed her.
The next day my mentor broke it down over breakfast and here’s some tips that he passed down to me and now I’m passing down to you. Read closely and pay attention, because these tips took my game to the next level.
#3. You Are Always Gaming, But To Varying Degrees
When you meet a girl and she instantly has her bitch shield up and is going tit for tat with you, then pull out every ‘trick’ in the book and your game has to be on point, but when a girl is naturally into you from the get-go, it’s less of trying to overcome her bitch shield to initiate attraction, but instead amplifying her attraction and building comfort.
In the story of what happened to me, I could have simply flirted with the brunette, leaned back and been chill, playfully teased her some and built comfort so when we got to my mentor’s house she would have been ripping my clothes off. Instead, I overgamed her and as a default was presented with opportunity to escalate physically with her, but fucked that up as well.
Sometimes, less truly is more.
Learn to start reading girl’s Indicators of Interests and pay attention to detail. If a girl from the get-go is touching you, her eyes are glowing and she’s seemingly into you, then focus on building some more comfort and handling logistics. You don’t have to ‘neg’ a girl to death and then wonder why she walks off bewildered at your behavior.
#2. Some Girls Go Out To Find Dick, Be That Guy
Especially now more than ever, a lot of game is simply reading the signs of DTF girls in a venue and then spitting some light game with them and then handling logistics. Believe it or not, there are girls who go out with the intention of finding some dick. I’ve heard it said to me and overheard girls say this more times than I can count.
Some of my lays have surely been not from my airtight game, but simply fitting the bill for a DTF girl. Although there’s always a more attractive guy in the venue etc, if you approach then you make yourself your own opportunity. If you approach 20 girls in a venue, odds are at least one of those girls will be DTF and you will be initiating it, although she’s primed and ready: it’s just a matter of a guy acting like a man and approaching her which is what she wants.
#1. Learn To Shut The Fuck Up
I am a blabbermouth, if you couldn’t tell already on my podcast. While this is an interesting aspect of my personality and has gotten me lays, it also has cockblocked the hell out of myself many many times.
If you have the same problem, learn to shut up.
Not everything single thing you say has to be a ‘neg’ and a witty comment. Less is more and a subtle tease here and there, followed by ‘normal’ talk, then some flirtatious remarks is usually more successful, then a full-blown tirade of game techniques.
The more I’ve learned to lean back, say less and show more through my eyes, the more successful I’ve been with pulling girls for a ONS. Girls love mystery and they love to guess at what you’re thinking. Use that. Let their minds run and wonder. Don’t fill in every blank and answer every question with logic, just be light, playful, but not annoying.
One issue I’ve noticed with new students of mine who are hell bent on improving their game, is that they tend to overgame. One thing I tell them is that if a girl is initially into you, take that small attraction and build it through DHV and slight push-pull. Don’t over push and under pull. There has to be a balance.
This weekend, if you find yourself overgaming, just take a step back and be chill. Watch her body language. Is she focused on you? Is she touching you? Is her attention on you? Then just proceed with a laid back air, and focus on building comfort and setting up logistics. You might just find that pulling a girl the same night is easier than you’re making it out to be.
Read More: A Message For Readers