10 Lies We’ve All Told

I have a big mouth.

If you haven’t heard my podcast yet, maybe you’ve gotten that vibe from my writing.

While I can use my mouth for good, sometimes being a mouthy motherfucker can be bad, especially if I don’t speak truth.

The truth will truly set you free and I identified some phrases that are bullshit lies that I’ve been guilty of speaking and maybe you have too.

Scratch that: we are all guilty of speaking doubt, confusion and statements that imprison possibility, instead of hope, clarity and the limitless possibilities available to us when we take control of our own lives.

Here are 10 bullshit phrases I’ve seen used by people who are not successful.

They could be, but they are standing in the way of themselves. If you want to be a man who is in control of his emotions and is bound and determined with every fucking fiber of your being to fuck being average, then cut these bullshit phrases out of your everyday speech.

I did and I noticed a BIG difference in my overall attitude, productivity and the energy I was giving off to others.


10. “I can’t…”

This has to be one of biggest Success Blocks to mankind. Yes. You. Fucking. Can. If you do nothing else this week, but eliminate this phrase out of your daily speech, I can promise you will be more productive and your eyes will start opening to the possibilities that your life has right in front of you.

9. “She won’t…”

ERRRRR! Wrong. We know over here at this blog that game can make the impossible possible. So anytime you see a pretty girl and you think ‘I’d like to get her number…but SHE WON’T’, I want you to physically slap yourself. Well don’t physically slap yourself, although that would be a hysterical moment for the people walking by, but mentally slap that bullshit lie out of your mind and approach her. Don’t believe the Game Denialist devil on your shoulder. Knock that motherfucker off and approach.

8. “But…”

But…but…but what the hell does ‘but’ almost always come before? An EXCUSE. Don’t be a ‘but’ guy (although nice round butts I am a fan of), when it comes to excuses. If you want to use ‘but’ use it like this: “I will close this mega deal in a couple of hours, BUT I am still counting money from the last deal I closed yesterday”. Drop the excuses and become a man of action, instead of a ‘but’ man who never quite gets ahead in life. You know the ones, BUT don’t be one.

7. “If only…”

Geez this one is a personal pet peeve of mine. Some people get that dreamy look in their eyes when they use this bullshit lie and stare off into the distance like they just saw a naked ballerina walking on water. “If only…” what?  ‘If’ is a cancerous word that is another favorite of excuse droppers. “If only I get that promotion…”, “If only my parents were rich…”, “If only I had a college degree…”, “If only I were taller…”. No. Fuck ‘ifs’ and don’t let others dictate your destiny. YOU control it and when you claim that right you will see real substantial progress in your life. Now go and ‘if only’ no more.

6. “I’ll start it AFTER…”

Ahhhh…this one is usually spouted off by the guy who always has a dream, but never puts action into it. This is a dangerous phrase my friend. Dangerous as hell. If you always wait for the perfect time, then you will never get anything done. Don’t be overwhelmed by your dreams and visions, instead be inspired and start with one baby step. Then take another one and another, until you’re running up the hill chasing your dream and making progress you never thought possible before. Unleash your potential by putting a leash on the lies that have kept you from being the man you can be. Change “I’ll start it AFTER…” into “I’ll start NOW…”.

5. “Now’s not the time…”

This one is the baby brother of “I’ll start it AFTER…”, but note the small but important distinction. While #6 is waiting for something else to happen first before taking action, “Now’s not the time…” is the voice of doom that’s waiting on…what? Exactly. What the hell is this phrase spouter waiting on? You know those people who are always prattling about the doom and gloom of the world? Yea, the ones who never get shit done, are unhappy and discontent about everything in life? Yea, those people. They usually lower their voice, get a stern expression on their face and say with a sigh, “Now’s not the time”.

Fuck that attitude. Now IS the time, because unless you own a time machine (and if you do let me know!), then you don’t control it and as they say, time waits for NO man. Either you can control time by being disciplined and taking action NOW, or just you know…wait on it, until time suits you. Change your “Now’s not the time…”, to “Now IS the motherfucking time!”, because I promise you that if you wait for life to be perfect before you take decisive and real action, you will wake up one day full of regrets.


4. “I can’t control…”

Whew! I love hearing this one said, well not really because I hate all of these phrases, but this one I kind of like hearing because I can then help the phrase spouter out by identifying why 99.9% of the time they actually DO have control. Here’s the deal gents: we have more control of our lives than we realize. Society will beat you down and brainwash you into believing that you don’t have control, in order to…wait for it…CONTROL YOU. Take back control of your life! Taking control usually involves a healthy dose of action, sacrifice and strategy, but YOU can do it.

Let me be very raw and real right now: my #1 problem when I was homeless was that I didn’t believe I had control of what was happening to me. While I did hit a streak of life changing obstacles that would make even the blessed Pope kick puppies and curse in a temple, it was mostly IN MY CONTROL, but I was blinded by my circumstances. When I took control of the situation, analyzed the stupid mistakes I was making and took action, is when I pulled myself out of the gutter. You CAN control more than you think, so drop this deadly phrase from your daily speech and start seeing positive results in your life.

3. “My buddy told me…”

Is your buddy Donald Trump? Is your buddy Mark Cuban? Is your buddy a self-made millionaire who’s doling out advice about how to be a millionaire? If so, then yes, please quote him, listen to him and take his advice to the bank. If NOT though, then stop taking advice from those who are clueless about what they are preaching to you. It reminds me of the average bodied, or over-weight ‘trainers’ charging people to get trained in the gym. Get. The. Fuck. Out. Of. Here. Unless someone really has results to back up their advice, then take it with a grain of salt, or don’t take it at all. And choose your mentors wisely. Getting advice from someone is an excellent idea, but make sure that the source actually knows what the fuck they’re talking about or you might wind up in worse shape.

2. “It’s not just me…”

Oh?? Then who is it? Is it someone in your life that’s standing in the way of your progress. This can be a very real ‘problem’, but see it’s not a problem that YOU can’t fix. Girlfriend standing in the way of your success? Dump her. Job holding you back from taking a risk and starting your own company? Quit. Parents driving you fucking nuts with rules and regulations that prevent you from really chasing the life you want? Start sleeping in your car or your buddy’s couch.

If it’s NOT just you and that’s the truth, then identify WHAT or WHO it is and remove yourself from their presence. Choose your friends wisely, choose your mate even more carefully and while we can’t help the family we’re given, you can most certainly distance yourself from them. How bad do you fucking want it?

1. “When I get the time…”

This is the most dangerous of all of these phrases. You will wait and wait and wait for the time, but fuck all if time could give two fucks about what we want. Make the fucking time. Do it because you want to achieve your dream no matter if it’s saying ‘fuck off’ to your 9-5 job that you hate with a passion, or becoming great with women, or traveling the world, you cannot wait for it, you must TAKE it and do it right the fuck now.

What is a negative bullshit phrase that you’ve cut out of your vocabulary?

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Read More: You Got To Have The Want To

15 Replies to “10 Lies We’ve All Told”

  1. More articles like this. As a recovering chump I have to get my mind straight. This is potent stuff and I will use it in combination with your affirmations advice. So critical to having a powerful life as a man.


  2. I’ve been experimenting with positive self-affirmations.

    Positive thoughts began to surface in my mind as I was driving last night instead of my old negative thought patterns (doubt, limitations, being critical of others)

    It took me several days of affirming good beliefs to myself before they naturally surfaced last night

    thanks for the encouragement, C of Rhino


    1. I generally recommend making them a habit by committing to 21 days to start seeing the positive change, but that’s good it’s already started for you. Everyone will react differently to doing them, but the fact remains they definitely work.


  3. “i have to “. as in “i have to settle down” , “i have to have children ” , ” i have to buy a house” etc. it was a relief to finally realize i dont have to do anything except pay taxes and die.


  4. Number three is a big one for me. I have listened to much of the negative advice on forums, blogs, etc. regarding Black men not being able to get NE Asian women, much of it from a bunch of pissants that I don’t even know that certainly do not have my better interests in mind. There is some truth to it to a degree, but actually getting back out there and being in the field was a totally different experience. The solution was to just go for it and scratch the itch.


    1. Agreed. I’ve learned to first look at who is giving the advice before the advice itself — are they worth a damn? Or more specifically , what’s their track record in the field they are giving advice in (business, game, fitness).


  5. Personally my life started changing when I cut out the “It’s not my fault!” phrase. When I stopped blaming other people for the situations I put myself into and the consequences of them, I got a new sense of responsability and started to learn from mistakes instead of just mourning over them. Great list, man.


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