“Life is short. Life is dull. Life is full of pain. And this is a chance for something
What do you think of when you think about Direct Approaching?
What wordplay comes to your mind when you think of Provider Approaching?
Nothing I’ve seen in a film captures direct approaching quite like a scene from Vicky Cristina Barcelona. Javier Bardem plays a character who seduces women and does it rather well. While the film is not perfect and his game is not perfect, this scene is a good example of direct approaching. Below the clip I breakdown exactly what is going on step-by-step for you so you can see how it works.
00-10 Seconds: He approaches like a lion on the prowl for his next meal. Consistent eye contact switching between the two girls, but NOT in a shifty manner. He then asks, “American?” which is a neutral non-sexual question opener. Odds are a girl will respond to a question like this because it’s ‘non-threatening’.
10-13 Seconds: the blonde (Scarlett Johansson), maintains his eye contact and is obviously interested. The brunette instantly looks to the blonde because she’s not immediately interested and is clearly deferring to the leader of the two, aka the alpha female. The brunette shoots the blonde a “OMG you told him our names?!” look right at the 13 second mark. If you were in this situation, you would instantly know that the blonde is the one who you encourage and the brunette is the one you question charmingly and build comfort with.
13-15 Seconds: Javier asks the blonde “What color are your eyes?”, instantly getting into a ‘sexual’ state. He is smart and knows that maintaining eye contact can induce feelings of love, as I wrote about here backing it up with science. Note how he IGNORES her answer and doesn’t even offer his name. He is LEADING the interaction and utilizing Frame.
16-25 Seconds: The blonde responds after a flirtatious smile with, “They’re blue”. Javier gives her a long dominate look, BEFORE switching eye contact to the brunette to invite them to go with him. He knows that the blonde is in the bag and he needs to give the brunette some attention. Note how he switches eye contact at the tail end of his invitation back to the blonde. I cover this exact method of utilizing eye contact in the academy.
26-30 Seconds: The brunette quickly responds with a stupid question due to her lack of knowledge about the country she is in, but note how Javier holds frame like a motherfucker, maintains eye contact and then ups the ante by saying, “We leave in one hour”. This creates a “yes”, or “no” scenario and is something I use CONSTANTLY when out on the town. “Girls let’s go”. No, “Well, ummm, do you think maybe you girls might want to come with me for a little bit?”. Be direct. Be confident. Be dominating. The ones who come, WANT to come. The ones who don’t (and there will be ones who don’t), oh well, at least you swung your balls around the room.
30-34 Seconds: The blonde asks where it (Oviedo) is and Javier responds with, “A very short flight”. Now note this is very fucking key: he makes it seem close (whether it is or not doesn’t matter, it’s a matter of getting them to commit. Once you’re on a plane…) and he drops some bait, “By plane”. This is an instant status move. Now, if he was doing a Beta Bitch Boy Provider Approach, he would have walked up and said, “Girls I have a plane and would love to show you around. I’m rich and successful and this will be fun”. I.e. he’s trying to convince them LOGICALLY and trying to IMPRESS them. Javier is stating is AS FACTS because that’s the way it is. HUGE fucking difference!
35-42 Seconds: He sparks their IMAGINATION which is extremely powerful when seducing a woman. He mentions a sculpture that is “Very inspiring, very beautiful” and throws in Comfort “You’ll love it”. Comfort is key when being this direct. Don’t forget that. I use this constantly when picking up girls from the club to take them to home, or to a party: “SUV is outside, don’t worry about your car I’ll have you back in time so you don’t get a ticket”. In other words, I answer their OBJECTION BEFORE THEY SAY IT OUT LOUD. I know every girl in LA worries about getting a ticket on her car, or getting locked in a parking lot overnight, so I ease that worry immediately which builds comfort. Remove the obstacles to getting them home this way.
43-57 Seconds: The brunette continues her questioning and he escalates it, by saying, “No, we’ll spend the weekend”. He then states what will happen like “Drinking good wine” (what girl doesn’t like to drink wine? Plus this gives them plausible deniability in case they should have sex), “We’ll make love” (VERY DIRECT and you don’t necessarily have to be this bold, BUT at least they know the deal from the jump: he’s not taking them because he wants to be their friend, he’s doing it because he finds them attractive and wants to fuck them both. His Frame is rock-solid and he truly could give two fucks.
58-1:03: The brunette tries to make him shut down over what he said and he states it matter of factly, but not arrogant like. He’s not ashamed of his desires because he is a man who goes after what HE wants.
1:03-1:05: He states “Let me get your bill”, but he’s not stating it like a question. Now we could debate until the cows come home whether that’s beta of him to pick up their bill or not, but in this case I don’t see it as beta. I see it as the final nail of comfort in the coffin. By picking up the bill it shows he can ‘take care of them’ on a trip. Is that necessary? No, but in this case it works.
1:06-1:21: The brunette continues to be a bitch and this is when he drops some gold, with his line that I quoted at the top of this post. He is being very real, but NON-NEEDY. You can get away with almost anything you say if you say it from a place of being NON-NEEDY. His point is logical, but he also throws in words that spark EMOTION in a woman, a necessary ingredient for seducing one. Note that the blonde is shooting Javier looks that scream, “I WANT TO FUCK YOU”. He maintains her attraction by giving her eye contact here and there, but he knows that the blonde doesn’t need convincing, it’s the brunette, so he gives her more of his focus.
Who said picnics can’t be innocent?
1:22-1:32: She calls him out asking who he is and he answers quickly and assuredly. He then makes a SMALL joke about which girl is who based on the names they gave him earlier. Note the FLICKER of a smile he gives at 1:31.
1:38: The blonde blatantly checks out his package. Girls will do this if you’re standing and they are sitting, because basically your cock is in their face (depending on your height). She also can’t stop staring at him.
1:38-1:41: He throws out a compliment for the both of them. This is a tricky play, but when done confidently and matter-of-fact like it can work.
1:42-2:01: Now here’s where a classic game technique is used: he turns the one friend against the other. It’s as though he now knows the brunette is a complete cunt and he will need the support of the blonde to pull this off.
2:02-2:05: The girls share a knowing look, because he’s dead the fuck on. Look for those looks that girls give each other when you say something. You’ll start to know when you just read their mail.
2:06-2:09: The blonde opens up her body to him (mating behavior) and sidesteps the question (because she doesn’t want to be rude to her friend) and then brings up her eyes again. Note her body language. She WANTS to be fucked. Learn these body cues.
2:10-2:12: Note how Javier lingers his eyes on her, as though he’s undressing her with his eyes. Classic seduction with the eyes. Use your eyes.
2:13-2:30: The brunette rambles off on some psycho-babble bullshit that’s typical behavior of many females in social situations today and wait for it…
2:31-2:32: He comes right back with a sound good question that would make her look stupid: “What offended you about the offer?” i.e. ‘why are you retarded darling?’ But said firmly and WITHOUT hostility. This is key. He knows he can probably ‘crack her’, but it’ll take patience.
2:33-2:36: He is clear with his INTENT once again. He makes no apologies for being a man who finds women sexy. Remember that.
2:36-2:46: The brunette stutters and rambles off more $10 words in her effort to stump him. Meanwhile the blonde is on the verge of unzipping his pants. HAAAAA I love it!
2:46-2:48: The blonde ‘tags’ him and cements her decision verbally with “I would looooveeee to go to Oviedo”. Boom bitches! I wish the camera would have been on Javier to read his expression when she said that, but an appropriate one would be a slight wink at her, like and unspoken, “I know and it’s on darling”.
2:49-2:54: The brunette tries to cockblock, but because of the ‘work’ that Javier has put in, the blonde is entirely convinced. In fact, she reaffirms her decision, but this time with even MORE conviction. She’s offering her pussy on a silver platter. The smile on her face at 2:54, is that of a beaming girl who’s about to dab her pussy with a napkin cuz she it’s wetter than a motherfucker!
2:55-3:06: The blonde and Javier don’t break eye contact and Javier wisely escalates with the beautiful lips line. This is his way of sexualizing it again and he even SAYS the word “sexual”. Don’t be afraid to be direct gents. You will get blown out here and there as with any approach, but fortune, or pussy in this case, truly favors the bold. There is no questioning what is going to happen later. You are either fucking her, or dicking around for 2 hours trying to feel her out. Fuck that. Your time should be more important.
3:06-3:13: The brunette continues to stammer, while the blonde throws him a Shit Test with the, “I can’t guarantee the love-making, because I happen to be very moody”. Javier doesn’t even blink and responds with…
3:14-3:33: A line about not negotiating like it’s a contract. He then drops more DHV with the line about borrowing his friend’s plane and that he is a very good pilot. Note how he doesn’t give the blonde eye contact after her shit-test. He brushes it off like it was nothing.
3:34-3:36: He says, “Think it over”, which is a way of dialing down the directness (good to alternate between ‘high pressure’ and ‘low pressure’) and then exits, but not before another dominate and lingering gaze on the one who he knows is in the bag: the blonde.
I won’t spoil the movie for you (I believe you can find it on Netflix), but let’s just say he gets it in (or does he? 🙂 )
Going direct gentlemen, will do the following for you:
- Save you time!
- Help you weed out the girls DTF, from the ones who will not, FAST!
- Boosts your confidence because it takes BALLS to do so. Anyone can ask a girl for directions to a shop; that doesn’t take balls.
- Shows instantly that you believe your value is such, that she should conform immediately to your plan. Major turn on for feminine women who like strong men.
- Show you just how willing women can be to go from you being a complete stranger to them, to letting you be inside of her within minutes, or within a couple of hours or so.
To learn the best type of game in the world, go here: