The focus of self-improvement for men should be a given.
It shouldn’t be a hobby, a phase, or something to try out; it should form the core of your life.
But here’s the deal, the givens such as lift weights, read books, approach girls and fatten your bankroll have been beaten to death. Doesn’t mean I won’t do an article or two about those specific topics on the future, but for right now I want to focus on some other areas that you can use to grow as a man that aren’t so obvious. I tweeted about this in November, but am expounding on it here.
#4. Realize You Don’t Know It All
This one is hard.
You leave college with a degree, countless drunken notches under your belt and you truly believe that you know everything there is to know about life, until you start living REAL life.
College isn’t reality; it’s a bubble.
Once you get out, then you start experiencing life and it can swiftly kick you straight in the groin.
It happened to me.
My ego became a stumbling block multiple times to the point where I had to hit rock bottom in order to rebuild myself.
Some ego is good, but when you let your ego control and lead you 24/7, then you’re setting yourself up for disaster.
#3. Get On Your Grind
I’ve written about this a few times:
(and more if you search the archives, but this will get you started)
However, it’s always a good reminder to understand that we don’t inherently DESERVE anything.
A sense of entitlement will crush your work ethic, turn your goals into mere dreams and lay the groundwork to be average as fuck.
#2. Listen More To Those Older And Wiser
It’s not a new thing where young people ignore the advice of older people, but it doesn’t have to be YOUR path.
I can honestly say that I would have NEVER gotten ahead in life if I didn’t listen to men who were far wiser and more experienced than me.
Be a sponge.
Soak up their knowledge.
Check your ego at the door and LISTEN to their advice and actually USE it.
I can guarantee that you will still make some mistakes here and there, but you will be much further ahead than your peers if you get some mentors and use their wisdom to carve out your ideal life.
The world is full of young men who thought they knew it all and it’s clear they don’t. Don’t be one of them.
#1. Say Less
This ties into the aforementioned point. God gave us two ears and one mouth, etc, you know the saying, but there’s something even more powerful about listening more and saying less.
Silence is powerful. Not just in game, which I wrote about here, but in business and in general social skills.
This doesn’t mean you’re a mute, but what it does mean is that you can be comfortable with not having to be Blabber Brad in the group and you’ll find out more about the people around you and then can use that to your advantage. This is some 48 Laws of Power jedi-mind stuff.
Is it easy?
I still struggle with talking too much, but with discipline and practice I’m getting better. And you know what? It’s a good thing. It’s forced me to REALLY listen when people talk, to enhance my friendships, to become better when negotiating in business and to gain more wisdom from those much smarter than me.
Here’s the obvious things you should be doing to grow as a man:
- Lift Weights
- Make Money
- Read Non-Fiction books
- Approach Girls
- Eat Healthy
And here’s the non-obvious things you should be doing to grow as a man:
- Realize You Don’t Know It All
- Get On Your Grind (this isn’t even an option, but a necessity)
- Listen More To Those Older and Wiser
- Say Less
Self-improvement as a man isn’t just a phase, something to try out, or a trend to follow: it’s the foundation of your life of which all great things will transpire.
Get the books.
Learn the system.
Listen to podcast.